I just finished watching the Dexter season 5 finale and I am surprisingly still alive. I really had expected to die during the show tonight from some sort of heart attack, but one of the things I have learned about this show is that the build up is sometimes more frightening than the the outcome (with exception of the season 4 finale). Not all season finales can be as intense as last season, but I still thought this season, as a whole was awesome. I absolutely loved season 5. FAVORITE so far! But it may have a lot to do with the fact that this was the first season I was actually able to watch in real time. However, I think it mostly had to do with Julia Stiles. Spoilers below!
Because of Julia Stiles' character, Lumen, we were able to see a part of Dexter we had never seen, a tender, loving, and completely unfiltered lover version of Dexter. Because Lumen was broken and had the same "Dark Passenger" as Dexter, he was able to fully be himself with her, and for the first time, feel like he could connect to someone genuinely and be human. Now, my love for the character of Dexter is like that of an overprotective older sister, I think. I find myself, while watching, wanting to hold him or wanting to give him a hug, console him or comfort him. So watching Lumen finally fulfill that part of Dexter's life, allowing him to feel like he's not the only person on Earth, was so wonderful for me. That moment, when it dawns on Dexter, that she looks at him and doesn't see a monster, that she appreciates him, ALL of him, was perfect! It was so special. And the first time Dexter realizes he may love Lumen was one of the sweetest things, in my opinion.
Perhaps my favorite moment of this entire season was, well obviously, the moment that all the walls come down and Lumen reaches out to Dexter. The embrace these two share in that episode was not just one of the first touch of two lovers, but the rebirth of these two broken people. Dexter, in this moment, is finally able to be with someone who knows his entire self and still cares about him, and his reaction in this moment could not be more touching. As for Lumen, this man has been her savior and guide and now he is her refuge. It was just such a beautiful scene. They have shared a deep intimacy and trust that few couples will ever share, and that moment allowed those emotions to come to fruition.
Which brings us to the finale and how things end. With the death of Jordan Chase, Lumen's need to kill no longer exists, so she decides that she will have to leave because she knows Dexter will not be able to stop his "Dark Passenger." And therefore, once again, Dexter's need to kill will keep him from having the companionship he desires and needs. What is really heartbreaking about this scene is that Dex begs Lumen not to go. We see flashes of anger and weakness (maybe desperation) we've never seen before. Is he mad at Lumen? I was. But I believe Dexter was more angry at himself for allowing himself to believe that he could have that sweet little life, with a lady who would accept his Dark Passenger, and she could meet all his friends, and his children, and share and understand his double life. The one thing he was missing with Rita was allowing her to know him completely, and I think with Lumen, he believed he might achieve it, only to have that hope (the highest hope he'd ever allowed himself to have) crashed by the reality that Lumen is not as damaged as he is. She is healed, and she must move on.
"Don't be sorry your darkness is gone. I'll carry it for you. I'll keep it with mine."(Be still, my heart!)
With that being said, I don't believe that the feelings they have for each other are gone, and since Lumen did NOT die, there is no reason for me to believe that one day she won't show up in the show again. I really hope to see her sometime in the 6th season, even though I doubt it. They were such a beautiful pair for this short while, and now it was tied up so nicely, I doubt they could re-open it. But I really just want Dexter be happy. What was truly sad about this finale is Dexter beginning to believe the last 5 years of trying to be human and nearly succeeding, was all a lie. He almost got there with Rita, only to find her murdered because of his extra-curricular activities. Then, he felt lost, but he was reborn in meeting Lumen, only to have the same issues drive her away. Could this be the last straw that makes him believe there is no point in trying?
Hopefully, Dexter will take into consideration that for a time, a person knew his secret. For a time, a person loved him despite, and respected him for it. For a time, someone loved all of him with no reservations, and could relate with him on every level. Hopefully, that will be enough for him, until he finds a better way to fulfill that void. I think the children coming to stay with him for the summer will help. Astor being sweet at the end was certainly a nice refreshing surprise.
One of the neatest thing that this season tackled was what right and wrong means, and how it's not always black and white. In many ways, in many situations within the story lines of this show, what is right is relative. This entire show is based on that principle with how Dexter views the world, but this season, many other characters learn their own perspective of right and wrong. We finally see Deb begin to construct her thoughts on this theme, and learn that not everything can be put into one side or the other. Her choice to let the "vigilante lovers" go shows that she's beginning to become a seasoned cop, like Laguerta or Angel, who make decisions based on what their experiences in the force have shown them. Also, that decision helped to keep me from dying in my seat of panic (haha).
Dexter is SERIOUSLY one of the best shows on TV, and now I am really not sure what to do with myself until season 6 returns. However, Justin just got me all 4 seasons on DVD so I think a re-watch is in order. What were your thoughts on the season finale? Please comment and share!
I was talking to my friend Matt, who I went to High School with, and he's now at NYU getting his masters in composing (which, on a side note, makes him perhaps the coolest person I know). I asked him when I was explaining my idea for this entry which story or movie changed his life. He replied it wasn't a story so much as a score he heard when he was 15 years old. It was the first Harry Potter score. ...And now he's a composer! Because of that one score he heard from 10 years ago. That's power. That score shaped his future. A good friend of mine from college said once: "Lives change on a day-to-day basis, for a number of reasons: either a best friend gets married or you see a beautiful sunset. Or you read a powerful book."
I'm sure anyone who has been interested in reading my blog is probably under the same belief that stories have the power to change perspectives, change ideas, change hearts, and under the right circumstances maybe even change lives. I really wanted to have an entry where people could discuss and talk about the story that impacted them in this way. In my experience, there has been one movie that has impacted me more than any other: The Lord of the Rings.
It was through reading this series that I discovered I could enjoy reading. No one assigned me these books. No one forced me to test over them. I picked them up on my own and read them, and found I couldn't put them down. I never imagined before that I could ever feel so attached to a book. This was the beginning of me experiencing what (I later learned) Keat's called “the holiness of the Heart’s affection and the truth of Imagination.” I began to realize that some things that are created in the mind can be more real than some actual things in our lives, and through fantasy, real-life truths can be found. A Tolkein scholar has said, "People make the comment that this type of fantasy is escapist and evading the real world, but I think that [thinking] is an evasion. [The story] is actually trying to confront something that some people would rather not confront."
Also, I fell in love with the cast of this movie. They will, perhaps, always be the cast-love-of-my-life. I don't know another movie that has ever been cast so perfectly. But besides that, they also gelled so beautifully with each other behind the scenes, it was that much more fun to watch them on screen. Chemistry abounds! Watching the actor commentary and seeing pictures of them from set, hanging out, or even red carpets was just a blast because you knew they loved each other, these films, and the experience of making them as much as you did. These movies/this story changed their lives, too, and it made me feel like I was, in some way, connected to these people. Because even though our lives were changed in completely different ways, they were still changed for the same reason and by the same means. 
Ultimately, because I adored this cast like I did, I wanted to watch all the special features I could get my hands on about the making of the film. I learned about every element of film-making, from adapting and writing a script, to story boards, to casting, to making scenery, to props, to directing, and much, much more. It made me discover my love for the art of film-making and it awakened my passion and interest in everything that goes with it.
